Finding Emotional Resilience

Intelligent Conversations

I recently stopped by the “Intelligent Conversations Podcast” for another meaningful conversation. Everyone has a form of intelligence that resides in them. It is a podcast where ordinary people share their experiences and insights to help others navigate through life’s journey. My last interview was on Let’s Talk and it’s been a blessing and an honor to always be invited to share my story and be heard. In this episode, I also provide the listeners with valuable advice that we can all learn from to grow as individuals and find the emotional resilience to keep pushing forward. I am glad to finally find the courage to speak and accept my truth.

Making Hard Choices

We started by talking about the experiences that lead me to this point in my life. I have had a life filled with many repeated and unhealthy cycles. I always wanted to find that mentality to choose better and ask: Why is this cycle repeating? Do I want a life filled with issues of anxiety, depression, rejection and abandonment? Do I want to live this type of life? I had to choose to accept my past, all of it. For years I took responsibility for a lot of guilt, shame and things that were beyond my control. I can only be responsible for my own actions and I had to accept everything from the begining and choose what I want to accept for my future.

The host asked if it was hard to get to this new mentality of positive choices. He also was curious about what my advice would be for listeners who are trying to find their own truth and opportunities.

It was a very hard process. I made choices based on what people expected me to do. I went through a period of running away from my truth. I believe that reinvesting in yourself is the biggest gift you can give yourself. I learned that the more I dove into investing in me and loving me, the more I attracted the right kind of people.

The host asked me about the obstacles I encountered in my life and the relief I felt after overcoming them.

I was determined to never give up and never give in. A lot of times I had suicidal thoughts about whether this life was worth living. Even with 4 children at the time! It got that bad! It was this hope in God and faith that lead me to make it through the next day. I was given away by both of my biological parents and I had to come to grips with the rejection and abandonment. That was one of the truths that I had to accept. I went through 4 failed marriages and a phase of grieving my first protector who was my adopted dad. I went through a difficult stage where I lost him.

Finding Emotional Resilience

The host asked what was the last step that kept me progressing with resilience.

I really rely on my faith and I apply that self-love daily. I do it for me, not anyone else. I remember being a workaholic just to avoid the pain. I worked 2 jobs and went to school just to avoid the pain. I went through a phase of not taking care of my body. These were the things I was doing that were not healthy. I had to reexamine the things I did that were not healthy. As I started reinvesting in myself, those were the lessons I learned to get to where I am now.

We all made bad decisions and messed up choices. Every choice we made has consequences. Today I am relying on God to help me balance the things that are beyond my control. I am taking the time out for myself. To invest in me, and understand who I am. To find emotional resilience and not get into those negative cycles.

If you ask yourself the right questions and have the patience to dig deep and reflect, that is one of the most powerful things you can do.